Hanging on and letting go
It might sound funny, but as your teens navigate through the waters of high school, you'll find it easier to accept their behavior if you watch for the "hanging on and letting go," and learn that it's just part of the normal growth of a teen.
So many times we wonder where our little kids went. You know the ones who wanted to snuggle up beside us on the couch and watch a movie? Well, if you watch closely, you'll see that they're still beside you, but not quite as often.
I watch as my 16-year-old regularly runs to the family room in the basement to watch one of her favorite evening TV shows with her 14-year-old sister. As she heads off, I think hmmm, I wonder if she remembers who I am? Then about 15 minutes before bedtime, she'll yell "Hey mom! Are you coming down here to snuggle up for awhile?" That's the "hanging on and letting go."
The next day she comes home and wants to bake cookies together or make dinner for me. The night after that she says, "Mom, can I go to Brooke's and sled after school on Friday?" Knowing that she'll be at her dad's house all weekend, I say "so I'll see you on Monday?" and she replies, "Yep!" as if it doesn't matter if I exist again. That's the "hanging on and letting go" again.
I like labels, because it makes it easier for me to understand human behavior. When I know she's hanging on and letting go, I also find comfort in the fact that she IS growing up to be an independent and beautiful young lady, and at the same time, she still loves me enough to request my presence during her favorite TV show or to make cookies.
It's ok if your teen is hanging on and letting go. He or she is just trying to find the same balance that we tried to find when we were working our way toward adulthood. It's a process. My daughter loves me and I love her. And ultimately, that's all that matters.
When you notice the letting go, take time to find the hanging on part too. They always reside beside each other... Just sometimes the hanging on part is harder to identify.
Love and light!
Coach Julie
So many times we wonder where our little kids went. You know the ones who wanted to snuggle up beside us on the couch and watch a movie? Well, if you watch closely, you'll see that they're still beside you, but not quite as often.
I watch as my 16-year-old regularly runs to the family room in the basement to watch one of her favorite evening TV shows with her 14-year-old sister. As she heads off, I think hmmm, I wonder if she remembers who I am? Then about 15 minutes before bedtime, she'll yell "Hey mom! Are you coming down here to snuggle up for awhile?" That's the "hanging on and letting go."
The next day she comes home and wants to bake cookies together or make dinner for me. The night after that she says, "Mom, can I go to Brooke's and sled after school on Friday?" Knowing that she'll be at her dad's house all weekend, I say "so I'll see you on Monday?" and she replies, "Yep!" as if it doesn't matter if I exist again. That's the "hanging on and letting go" again.
I like labels, because it makes it easier for me to understand human behavior. When I know she's hanging on and letting go, I also find comfort in the fact that she IS growing up to be an independent and beautiful young lady, and at the same time, she still loves me enough to request my presence during her favorite TV show or to make cookies.
It's ok if your teen is hanging on and letting go. He or she is just trying to find the same balance that we tried to find when we were working our way toward adulthood. It's a process. My daughter loves me and I love her. And ultimately, that's all that matters.
When you notice the letting go, take time to find the hanging on part too. They always reside beside each other... Just sometimes the hanging on part is harder to identify.
Love and light!
Coach Julie
posted by Julie Renee at 12:29 PM
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